I'm sorry, anon. For what it's worth, I'm glad you're here. I (OP of these threads) am grateful to everyone who helps keep the love alive.
You are in good company here as well. Shipgirls are one of the few things that can still make me feel, and the reason why I stopped fantasizing about death.
If you or anyone else would like to speak more in private, I can be reached here:
Delete the 1, that's just to stop spambots.
I can't take your pain away and I am in no position to be offering advice, but I can tell you that you are not alone.